The Problem

What do you do when you don’t feel you are spending enough spiritual time with yourself or God and yet you have external limitations that are holding you back? An example of this could be that you would like to go on a retreat but have work or family obligations. Maybe you would like to meditate more, but don’t have anywhere to go where you can really find the peace to do so. Maybe you just want to lead a better life, but there are factors in your life that are conflicting with that.

Honestly, I struggle with this often. I have a strong urge to head to the Far East and do some soul searching; maybe find some masters and use their batteries to charge mine. The problem there is that I have a family and I don’t think they would appreciate that. I’d also like to go on a week long retreat in the mountains, but my boss can’t seem to understand the need. Meditation is also an issue in my house because of children, lack of space, and the lack of facilities in the area. So, if my experience is any indicator, I would bet that a majority of people in the modern world experience problems similar to this.

The Question

We know what we need to do and we can sense the drive within ourselves; the call that leads us to living our Dharma, but the question is what do we do about it? Well, I start by saying I don’t have a perfect answer and believe me I have spent years pondering this question. What I’d like to do is make a few recommendations based on my experience and ask you to submit yours via comment or email.

My Thoughts

The truth is that we live in a modern society and our path to so called “success” in this society has driven a wedge between our spiritual life and our social/work life. We have a choice to make, we can either ignore our spiritual side and suffer, we can try to balance them, or we can truly realize what is the most important and devote ourselves to that. It is my belief that the first choice forces us to live in ignorance, the 2nd to live below our full potential, and the last to truly live our Dharma. However, I also believe that there is a progression that must be taken to get there. An honest assessment of what you need and how you can get there is one of the best things you can do to solve this problem.

Something we can do immediately is to make a list of what we really feel called to do, no matter how off the wall or ridiculous it may seem. When we write our thoughts, it tends to help us weed out things that we don’t really want as well as to more clearly define what we need. Once the desires are written down, we can then proceed to break the barriers to accomplishing them.

Secondly, although meditation can be tough in noisy or crowded environments, it can still be accomplished. I recently was talking to a friend of mine about my dilemma, and she recommended that I use the bathroom as a place to meditate. I’d never really thought of that option and to be honest it really made sense. That is one of the only places in my house where I can be left alone and get some peace. Sure, it is tough to spend 30-60 minutes in the bathroom meditating, but once we reach that point maybe we can convince our spouses or children that we are serious about our practice and would like more time alone for that purpose.

In regards to retreats or pilgrimages, what would be wrong with combining the experience with a family vacation? How about telling the boss that in exchange for a few days off, you would come in on the weekends or stay later during the week? And if your job or lifestyle conflicts with the path you feel led to walk, maybe it is time to leave that behind. I can honestly say that there have been many times where I have felt this conflict and for one reason or the other made excuses not to change. Most often, it related to a job or income issue where I was worried about the rug slipping out from under me. In the end, 100% of the time I found that following my path led me to a better place, no matter how much of a change I was making. In fact, the greater the change/loss, the greater the gain I experienced. Therefore, I feel safe in saying that if something is holding you back, make the decision to do it anyway and I bet that the spiritual powers driving you will also help clear the way.

Maybe we’re breaching on the topic of Intention, but I truly believe that if we really set our mind to doing something (which is helped by writing down our thoughts), we can move providence.

This leads me into my last thought before I leave you with some quotes. If we let go and let God show us the way, then we will find that there is always a door open for us to Live our Dharma. Personally, I could do with some more meditation and mindfulness to help me bring this truth home.

So I ask you again, what is stopping you from finding God? Remember, in a 100 years we will all be dead anyway, so why let something get in the way from what really matters?

“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decisions, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.”
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“The Creator has not given you a longing to do what you have no ability to do.”
- Orison Swett Marden

“Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast;
in the pool where you least expect it…there will be a fish.”
- Ovid

“To change one’s life:
1. Start immediately.
2. Do it flamboyantly.
3. No exceptions.”
- William James

“Don’t limit God’s ability to do by your capacity to receive.”
- Randall D. Worley

“Do not go where the path may lead; go where there is no path and leave a trail.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“One does not discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.”
- André Gide

Be Well…Padma

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Tags: dharma, life, live your dharma, peace, spirituality